Anaconda in SPACE
by EntityThatExists
Summary: Lance just wanted to listen to some music, instead he got something completely different. ... look idk this just happend.


**This is just absolute crack that hauted my mind ...**

In the control room above the training room Pidge, Hunk and Lance were tinkering on the control panels. Rather Pidge and Hunk were tinkering, Lance just sat on the ground besides them, bored out of his mind. He could try to help them, but these two tech geniuses surely had everything covered.

Searching for something to entertain himself with, Lance looked around. Various pads and Laptops were sprawled across the floor, connected to each other and the control panels by a confusing network of cables.

Lance took one of the pads. "Anyone mind if I play some music?", he asked.

"Not at all, go crazy.", was Pidges response.

Lance looked through the music saved on the pad, from the music listed he guessed the pad belonged to Pidge. He kept scrolling until one song caught his eye.

"Anaconda?", he asked. "Never took you for a Minaj fan, Pidgey." The green Paladin simply shrugged at that comment.

Lance pressed play and much to everyone's surprise the song started playing not over the pad, but the com system of the castle.

Pidge looked up from the Laptop she was working on "What the …"

"Something must be connected incorrectly.", Hunk concluded.

Over the com system of the 10 000-year-old alien castle space ship, that was currently playing a song about big asses, Keith's voice sounded: "Uhhh … What is happening?"

Then Shiro chimed in: "Guys, what did you do?", while Nicki Minaj's rap was heard throughout the ship.

Pidge hit a button on the panels in the control room to answer:" Sorry! Lance broke something."

"Hey! No, I didn't"

"I will try to fix it. Just go about your busyness with a lovely song accompanying you."

"Why don't we just press pause on the pad?", Hunk suggested.

Lance let out a groan. "I already tried that, all that happed was some weird message in altean showing up on the screen."

Pidge took the pad from him. "The castle's system must have connected to the pad … can one of you two dorks read altean?"

As the blue, green and yellow paladin failed at ending the first Minaj concert in deep space, the red paladin walked into the training room. Well Pidge had told him to go about his busyness and his busyness of course was to train. He tossed his jacked into a corner and walked to the centre of the room, unaware that three of his fellow paladins were on the floor of the control room above him.

Keith walked past an enormous Mirror on the wall of the room as the chorus of "Anaconda" began. He eyed his own reflection his hand wandering to his hip.

Keith huffed, smirking "At least fighting Zarkon gives me a decent ass."

In the control room above Lance heard Keith's voice, he looked down into the training room curious what the resident emo was up to.

Keith looked around the room, he was alone at least that's what he thought, Anaconda was playing on full Volume.

"I wonder if I still can do it …" He murmured to himself.

Lances eyes widened, no it can't be. Keith was slowly squatting down and stuck his ass out and then … began to … TWERK? "NOnonononono!", Lance thought "This is not happening right now. Also, penis this is no time to get erected WTF!"

Keith was moving his body perfectly in sync with the beat.

"What are you looking aaaaaaaa …" Hunk started before he saw the answer.

At that Pidge also got curious "Hey, what is it …"

The three of them stared in disbelief as Keith, stoic unemotional "lone wolf" Keith, was moving his ass like this was a retchet rap music video.

After a while Keith stopped and got up again, a satisfied smirk on his face as if he wanted to say "still got it!". He wanted to start training but he saw something in the corner of his eye. He looked up at the control room to see his fellow paladins staring at him with their mouths open.

Several seconds of complete silence passed. Then Keith drew his bayard.

"RUN!" Lance screamed as they were running through the long corridors of the castle, followed by Keith with his bayard in one hand his dagger in the other.

"I didn't see anything! I swear!" Hunk lied.

Pidge tried reason "Keith if you kill us we can't form Voltron anymore and Zarkon will win!"

"Well in that case vrepid sa!" Keith shot back.

They reached the bridge with Shiro, Allura and Coran there and quickly hid behind the black Paladin.

"Shiro! Save us!" Lance pleaded.

Shiro was just utterly confused. "What happened? Keith why are you so angry?"

"We saw him twerk," Pidge answered "And now he wants to make sure we don't live to tell the story."

"That's all? What's so bad about it? Keith pretty good at twerking. I would know, I taught him."

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

...

 **I'm sorry.**


End file.
